Turn On The Knicks Throwback Thursday – Patrick Ewing in Space Jam

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Just the idea of Space Jam 2 set the social media world on fire this past week, and while we still don’t know if there’s any truth to the rumors, we do know that there’s tons of public interest in it. If you grew up a basketball fan in the 90′s, the original probably ranks amongst your favorite sports movies of all-time. Michael Jordan stole the show throughout, but to Knicks fans, the Patrick Ewing cameos were equally entertaining.

Much to the delight of Knicks fans, the movie starts with Jordan’s retirement announcement, While MJ is failing at baseball, an alien race is introduced. These aliens run an amusement park called Moron Mountain, and like Jordan trying to hit a curve ball, are failing miserable. Their boss, played by Danny DeVito, and who looks like the cartoon version of him, is deadset on one idea, and one idea only: enslave the Looney Tunes and force them to perform for customers.

The only problem is that the aliens are about an eighth of the size of the Looney Tunes, and have no way of forcing them back to their planet upon arrival. The whimsical Bugs Bunny cuts a deal with them. The only way the Tunes will head to Moron Mountain is if the minuscule aliens can beat them at a game of basketball. Should be a cinch, right?

Wrong. The aliens use a special basketball to suck the talent out of five different NBA players; Mugsy Bogues, future-Knick Larry Johnson, Charles Barkley, Patrick Ewing, and unfittingly, Shawn Bradley. In a hilarious scene at Madison Square Garden, Ewing has his talent drained while heading to the free throw line. He goes on to shoot his attempt over the backboard a knock over the popcorn guy. Oh, to be young again.

Anyways, it turned Ewing from this:

space_jam_alien4

To this:

ewingbang

Once the Looney Tunes discover the size of their new opponents, they recruit MJ to save their lives. Meanwhile, the NBA guys try to figure out exactly what happened to their talent in a hilarious montage highlighted by Barry White’s Basketball Jones:

Ewing gets his own camera time at 1:40 of the video when his psychologist takes a jab at whether his lack of talent has leaked into the bedroom as well. While the deep, soothing voice of White sings “Yeah….yeah. Yeah,” Ewing immediately lashes out with a “NO!” The whole soundtrack was awesome, featuring more Jock Jams than a grade school dance.

Jordan, of course, goes on to save the Looney Tunes from disaster. In typical MJ fashion, he makes the game-winning dunk, expanding his arm like Stretch Armstrong to drop it in as time expires. He recaptures everyone’s talent, just in time for his return to the NBA. Sorry if I ruined the ending, but the movie was made in 1996, so if you haven’t seen it by now, let’s face it, you probably never intended to.

Now us Knicks fans will have our fingers crossed for Eddie 2.

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